It has been nearly two and a half years.I see the calmness in the pigeon's eyes as if she is still there....Some times i get confused .was it calmness ,was it fear....was it nothing at all...But some events and the actors who enact it are simply unforgettable.may be the circumstances in which its enacted is such...powerful.....simple....relevant...
TISS has lot of activity in the bushes,sometimes its the students but most of the creepers that hug them makes the campus heavenly...especially during rains.Its raining now and and i can imagine the transformation in the campus.Though TISS says goodbye to its students every year ,,,many like me can never say it.....or ..would ever say it...some thing like aatmasat has happened to us in this campus.
As i walked down the road just after the library ...i felt a movement around the gutter on the left side.I am very sensitive to such moments especially after seeing a long snake cruise across the basket ball court.People said that there lived a snake family in TISS.some even said that it was a Cobra.when i looked in closely i couldn't find any thing ......but in a fraction i saw a lone pigeon standing just beside the the stones kept at the border of the gutter. Some thing struck me ..about the pigeon..it appeared she was a kid..just learning to fly... she seemed to searching her way back to the nest.....Nothing appeared amiss .i went a step or two further and turned back to observe her ...now i felt her expression changing ...she seemed to be a bit restless....Suddenly about 10 steps to the side i saw a large cat..assuming the hunters position .in a fraction of a sec the cat had her by the neck...and She was gone . ...abruptly....i can never forget my helplessness...lack of initiative ...and fore thought ...like i felt on that moment....it was a moment of paralysis..
On that very day ....while starting from the dining hall there was this question in my mind ....How would i die? will it cause pain..will it be protracted....I jokingly asked my guru whether he knew about it !!!.....and a few steps after i saw the eternal hunter and the hunted drama being enacted in front of my eyes.......a colossal inner voice appeared from no where and said"you will die the pigeons death......swift....sudden.....and complete....the countdown shall start the day you will begin the journey back to your child hood.and the moment you are a child ...you will die...
What remains with me is a count down....every moment appears precious...and every body i meet appears divine.....I live every moment of my life...as though it was the last moment...the very last drop of wine .....drunk with this new found love for life......i dance in rejoice....and say....Zoya ....you are my childhood .the day i become one with you....i am no longer there....but iwoudnt mind it in any way......
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